I wish all weeks could start like this. I wish all the people could start their weeks like this.

As I was just taking my dog to a vet to get his shots, I called them and asked what to do. They told me to bring the cat over so they could check if it had an id chip. And to get him cremated. So me and Einari, we ran back to the house to get plastic bags. As we got back, I hesitated a bit, but then tried to lift the poor dead thing very carefully. I won’t go into any nasty details, but in the end I couldn’t fit him in the bag. And since we were on foot and in a hurry to the vet, and taking the bus, I just had to leave the cat behind.

I had my camera with me, so I took a few photos just in case they’d turn out to be useful in case the owner would show up and wanted to make sure it really was their cat. But, as I uploaded the photos on my computer, I actually found them very beautiful in all their dreadfulness. They made me think about a lot of things. They made me angry and sad, and made me want to show them to this cat’s owner in case they abandoned him or just let him out in the middle of all these busy roads.

The last two options aren’t that far fetched. A couple of months ago we actually saw this same cat with C hiding near our house. I really tried to make him trust me and approach me to see if he had a collar on, but he stayed far back. I tried to convince myself he was someone’s pet from nearby and would find his way home very soon.

I was wrong. And now I’m having the worst consience ever, thinking I could’ve saved him.

So, here’s picture number one, and here’s number two. Please don’t look at them in case you get easily upset by animal cruelty.

I just can’t decide!